Creature Comforts

Something that I would like to add to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is toilet paper. Honestly, you don’t know what you got till it’s gone.

In Kincaid’s court, they do not provide us with toilet paper, so we are left to fend for ourselves. As a result, many of us have turned to extreme measures, i.e. stealing toilet paper from restaurants and bars when we go out. Like, poverty. That stuff is bulky and obvious, and it’s really embarrassing when someone else in the bathroom catches you doing it, because nobody’s going to say anything, but then the bathroom power dynamic is all askew. YOU THINK YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME BECAUSE YOU CAN AFFORD TOILET PAPER? YOU’RE NOT.

In other news, I really want to be Abraham Lincoln for Halloween, but I feel like that would make me a prime sniping target. Which reminds me, for your viewing entertainment, I will include in this post a snipit of an email I recently received from the Middlebury abroad office referencing the terror alerts:

-Avoid traveling in groups of Americans.

-Do not speak English in public if you are in a non-English-speaking country.

-Avoid dressing in an overtly American fashion.

-Avoid areas with U.S. interests and areas associated with the U.S., such as the U.S. Embassy, American Express Office, McDonalds, Hard Rock Cafe, and other known American hangouts.

Is this a JOKE. How am I supposed to AVOID MCDONALDS. They put fudge in the McFlurrys here. Sniper no sniping!